woman wearing white top

Joy in the truth of the gospel!

What a mess. My heart breaks by what I see on social media these days…people judge others’ heart motives and force their personal “if-then” ideas. They echo themes of the book of Job, such painful destruction on top of his grief, financial loss, and chronic illness. Job’s “friends” accuse him Read more…

three red heart decors

A crisis of faith, a bursting of love

God has woven some underlying themes into my 35 years of suffering from chronic illness and pain, much like themes in a sonata. As I read my prayer journals, one theme has been the ongoing need to believe the gospel…daily.  I see the subtle spiritual warfare and temptation of the Read more…

round silver colored chronograph watch

How can we face a New Year? One hour at a time

I recently came to our Father with the pain of my suffering sisters in Christ as we live in this fallen world…cancer and chronic illness, depression and anxiety, financial and job pressures, loneliness and losses, death and grief, persecution, pains in motherhood and marriage, constant woundings of others… ”Oh Father, Read more…

woman holding christmas gift

A suffering Christmas with God’s gift of purifying and refining

I’ve been pondering the wondrous truths God reveals about His saving gift. I once asked Him, “What are believers in Christ saved from, exactly?” If anything brings me to my knees in humble gratitude within this year’s suffering Christmas, it’s His answers throughout Scripture. Handel’s Messiah echoes the truth, the very bad Read more…

cross during sunset

As I suffer, am I trying to “be God?”

My heart is in agony, and I have to share. Thousands have written me, having been taught that if we “do” things a certain way, God “has to” remove suffering and give us “favor,” as a reward for our works. Beloved, do you see the pride and pain this brings? It’s making ourselves into gods above Him. Read more…

an eagle flying in the sky

Lord, please give me “Be still, my soul” patience

As grief overwhelmed me, I lost my patience. Anger welled up and had to be honestly released with a shout. Shrouded in loss and shocked by my unusually loud reaction, I asked God to help me see what lay beneath my tear-full explosion.  My anguish had started with an unexpected Read more…

crop harvester with fresh eggplants in box

Spirit of God, teach me the patience of unanswered prayer

Friends are lovingly encouraging me to “be patient” when I get my hopes up and then end up feeling discouraged and disappointed in this rehab and recovery time. It’s a waiting time, one step forward, two steps back. It’s one of “longsuffering,” God’s word for “patience.” Are you waiting for Read more…

job print on book

When we feel like nothing, and no one is helpful in battles, we need our Helper 

I opened my phone, and social media tore into me. Memes complaining about “the world,” suffering and sin, and Scriptures meant to warn unbelievers wrecked my already-aching heart. When I realized I was suddenly feeling condemned and wallowing in “self” thoughts, I knew…these people’s posts were not helpful. When we Read more…

white and pink box

Amazing grace, how sweet the sound! God’s gift of grace!

My heart broke when I saw her post, changing the lyrics of this hymn, saddened by what had become her angered unbelief in God’s gift of grace in the gospel of Jesus Christ. Suffering rattles our trust in Him, doesn’t it? Oh, how we all need God’s amazing grace, offered Read more…

aerial view of a city

Singing the gospel when I’m afraid 

Father, The deceiver tempts us to fear that You’re punishing us when we suffer. When the hits keep coming, and we read the words of the Old Covenant, we’re easily afraid it’s our fault. We must not be doing enough to “earn” Your favor. Our accuser tempts us to think Read more…

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