person holding green grains

Trusting Jesus With My Future

As one who’s begged God for healing over many years of progressively worsening illness, Job feels like a chronic illness friend to me. Check out chapters 2, 7, 16, 19, 29, and 30 for gruesome details. Stories like Job’s remind me that it’s God’s healing mercy when we experience moments Read more…

person s scooping water by hands

A “praise interruption” into my pain and tears

For this musician who thinks and breathes in music, being unable to make music to our Lord was a heartbreaking loss. Overwhelming grief. For months, I was so sick as the resonating chambers in my head filled with pressure from my sagging brain and herniated brainstem, that I couldn’t sing Read more…

white clouds with sun piercing through it

Clinging to hope in God’s purposes as I suffer, like Jesus

Father,  It’s Your promise.  Please strengthen our hearts by fixing our eyes on Jesus today. Help us cling to hope in Your always-good purposes for Your beloved in Christ, as we suffer. For it can seem like there are no good purposes for our earthly suffering. But Your Word gives Read more…

person holding hand

When people don’t understand our suffering, we have our Friend

Job’s friends started well. They visited to “show him sympathy and comfort him” (Job 2:11). They mourned with him; they wordlessly sat with him, “for they saw that his suffering was very great” (Job 2:13). Maybe they didn’t know what to say?  Job himself was the “first to speak,” honestly sharing Read more…

white and pink box

Lord, YOU are my righteousness. Hallelujah!

Father, I come today so weary. Feeling alone and discouraged. Feeling so unrighteous as I hunger and thirst for righteousness, amid my hardship right now. You compassionately understand our deep need for You and have given us so many promises in Your Word. Thank You. You even encouraged Your people Read more…

green aurora lights in the sky

What if I don’t have “enough faith, weak faith?”

The enemy is such a liar and accuser when we live with suffering. Especially when it’s chronic, ongoing throughout this life. Especially in a crisis that lasts. Satan can tempt us to think that suffering means we’re “weak Christians” who don’t have “enough faith.” We easily feel shamed, judged, afraid, Read more…

mountains with crepuscular ray

God’s miracle happened before! To God be the glory!

When I tell the story, some respond in awe and praise God. Others scratch their heads, “Maybe He is real and still does miracles.” I’m holding my breath in awe, wonder, and trembling worship. God has done a miracle in my life, twice now. I’m so humbled by His grace Read more…

close up shot of king s crown on brown box

Crown Jesus Christ, who carries us through, into new!

Happy New Year! I’m now six weeks from God’s miracle of a second lifesaving brain surgery and I’ve prayed about what to share with you. I’ve been unable to write a blog post for several months. Why?  I was again walking the valley of the shadow of death, for the Read more…

decorative treble clef on bright gift boxes on white background

A “happy Birthday song” as I suffer on Christmas Day

The beautiful familiar story seems unique when we’re suffering. Those shepherds must have been cold. Lonely. Maybe they were tired of caregiving. Sick of beating down wolves. Weary of trying to find greener pastures and water, keeping the wandering ones safe, the sick ones sheltered and alive.  And who got Read more…

baby s feet on brown wicker basket

Your promises fulfilled! Hope as I suffer at Christmas!

Lord Jesus, You came. You condescended to earthly flesh, incarnating as a human. You, the Word made flesh, the Creator and sustainer of all things, holy and majestic God the Son…came. We bow before You today, in awe of who You are. Lo, within a manger lieshe who built the Read more…

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